Let's talk eBay for beginners. What's the one thing you can't do when you first start out?
Forget the fact to read the rule book! How could you not?! To use a tool you have to know how to use that tool.
In this episode KD breaks the beginning errors down and then offers a 3 step approach to feeling success. It doesn't have to be how much money you made this year. Instead, you can measure your success by how you made others feel on the way.
If you like the episode please leave us a rating or review. If you think we've earned it, it's always so very appreciated.
In the meantime, join the conversation at www.faceboook.com/SchoolofSelfMade. What kind of online business opportunities would you like to hear more about? Let us know so we can help.
Have a Podcast and Want an Amazing Website for FREE?
Try Podpage now. It's forever free with upgradable options. Within 5 minutes you'll have a website that looks amazing and functions great.
Buzzsprout - Let's get your podcast launched!
Start for FREE
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
Support the show (https://www.paypal.com/biz/fund?id=CHFU5TUZJKPXS)
Have you ever wanted to own your own business and be your own boss? Well, you're in luck because what I do is I teach people how to make money from home through a variety of different ways of online income. You're listening to the school of self-made my name's Kevin let's go
Ladies and gentlemen. My name is Kevin I'm with the school of self-made dot com. Some of that's been happening like in and around the circle was that I spent a lot of time. So like I'm in a lot of beginner groups on Facebook for multiple reasons. A I can get leads that way. B I specifically liked to help beginners. See, I don't know, I just enjoy it. Right. And there's a lot of other people in there that I do enjoy as well, but it seems like more and more, and this has been something that's been going on for awhile. I see someone that comes into a, like a industry or a field or a job. And they asked like how to do something, which is fine. I want you to ask questions if you're around me ask questions. Right. But don't ask questions whenever you were given the resources right before then, and you didn't take the time to learn that that's my frustration.
Right? So like today in a group that I'm in specifically about helping other people on eBay, people always say like, what should I sell? And again, you can literally Google on a matter of seconds, what sells on eBay? Electronic 16% of the sales every year for like three years. Now, you can see all that information, right? Quickly people tonight, specifically were asking things like what is managed payments manage payments was launched. I don't know, a year ago for months, eBay has been sending direct messaging, personal messages to all the members of their service, specifically to their inbox so they could understand what's going to happen. In addition to that, they also blast it all over their websites, all over their news section of your tool that you use specifically to post new things. It's there, right? They're doing their part. You're not doing yours.
That's odd. That's probably all it is. You chose to do this job without having the respect for a job. And instead thought you could wing it. And when then that didn't work, you went to other people, a lot of which also try to wing it. And you can tell that they try to wing it because there's different qualities in each group that you're in. There's some that are just full of rude and nasty people. Especially if you're new, if some that literally go out of their way, they're very structured. They go out of their way to try to engage and do things to benefit the members, especially new members like Dominic, the prime time, treasure Hunter that goes out of his way all the time to help other people. I got a lot of respect for that, mainly because I understand how, how unappreciated, that kind of thing is this isn't related to him at all.
I always just like everyone else, you see that, that little rumor of like all you Bay flipped the switch. I don't have any sales. Why are my sales down? Everyone asked that over and over and over. But the majority of people that ask that never pause to ask themselves what they could do better. And that is, I think my biggest frustration with society a lot of times is that they don't see that the issue is them. Instead. It's got to be someone else. Why do you have to think that way? Like why would it be so crazy to think that you were the reason that you didn't succeed at something? You know, I understand that I do things that get in ways, get in the way of me succeeding at certain things. I know that I don't understand how that spot and that thought process doesn't come up or maybe it does, but it's, you know, redirect somehow.
I don't know. So the consistent recently people will say certain or by sometimes people say like some, just some stuff that you are like, what are you talking about? And when is that ever worked? Or why was that like an okay idea in your brain to even put out in a public forum like that? And I get, it just doesn't make sense why you would do that. K's an example, a 20 year old kid that gives us well, Berkeley had reached out to a bunch of groups of four eBay, because if anyone, any kind of like advertising or done any studies in advertising, you had made, they always say to find your audience, you'd go where they are. And one of the low hanging fruit of that audience is typically they got a Facebook group. So if I want to find former college athletes, I played football at this school, whatever school was it WVU.
Cause that's where I want. If I want to find some alumni of that group, it is nothing more than a simple search for that college. And then the words, alumni, these groups, there are hundreds and hundreds of millions of them actually for everything. I personally control six, not all of them. Haven't been here for many members. Some of them only have met, but I went ahead and reserve that for later. So this kid comes in and says, Hey, like I got to college, I have a project. My project requires me to talk to people that do this, defined out their thoughts, their feelings, the way they see the, of how eBay handles their finances, it's instantly. And this, you know, I'm not going to get political right now at all, because I think we need a break from what we think is politics. Cause that's not politics, but that stuff is a circus.
We don't need that. I don't want that here. I'm good on it. Right. But what a lot of people did instantly was solid. The fact that he, he said he's from Taiwan or Singapore or wherever it was. I don't remember somewhere, not us, even though that the letter or message that was posted was in better English, grammatically structurally with the flow. Then 90% of the people that commented no, no chance that he's going to be an American. His parents live in America, he's overseas because he's studying abroad. He reached out to hundreds of people and a lot of people were just flat out rude to the kid. Only for the fact that they thought that he was going to scam them from their credit card information. What, I don't know. I don't know. Actually I don't understand that thought process. He asked me, can I interview you and then explain the project?
And I said, sure, because obviously if you've know me at all, you know that I will typically try to help someone if I can. And we scheduled time today to do it. And honestly, the interview was great. The kids are engaging. He is poignant. He holds himself very well. He doesn't interrupt. He doesn't step on his words. He he's, he's good at that. Right. And he was assigned to eBay. He didn't pick it. He didn't know anything about it, which says a lot of his characters. He didn't know anything about it, but he went out of his way and tried to reach out to hundreds of people. You know, that's a lot, right? Like that's, that's tough for people. People can't speak in public, right? That's like a fear, like an unnatural fear that people have. And this guy can pick up the phone and call someone at 20 years old.
He's going to be all right. When he's older interview, we speak, we talk premium some insides. I am twins, men sides of people that I have been around. I've even explained the efforts of those people. And I don't do this. Like when I speak about it, like I'm not in any way, trying to dumb down someone or make someone feel less than me. That's not what it is. Excuse me. Someone asked me one time, like, what do you think? You're perfect. And I'm like, if I thought I was perfect, do you think that I would try to better myself every day? Like when do you stop? There's gotta be a point. Right? There's you don't get more perfect. I don't think, I don't think that's the way you use the word, but this, this kid, we have their thing. And then I asked him afterwards.
I was like, yeah. How many people did you reach out to him? He's like, Oh, a couple hundred. How's that go? How many, how many committed three, three people. And then I look for just one or two or three minutes to find that post originally, that was shared yesterday later tonight, I found it. It just randomly showed up month timeline. And yesterday I read it briefly, but I didn't read a lot. Cause I was kind of busy doing work. And I didn't realize just the plane without sounding rude or vulgar or labeling someone. But the plain ignorance of people, he said, Hey, I just want to talk about these kinds of financial things. Because the project is on the ways that different companies e-commerce specifically distributes funds and what kind of tools that they offer their members. I don't know who picked it, but you know, he goes so a pretty large college that has quite a fallen.
So it's clearly going to be, you know, a decent little program, right. These people thought whenever he asked about how those funds come, does that mean he's going to try to steal their credit card information? And like, I dunno, like if he's gonna try to steal my credit card information, I think I would just hang up. Right? I mean he's 20 across the ocean. He's not coming after me. And if he were, then it was my, like, there's no reason to live your life in that constant fear. It's weird. But yeah. And then they start posting, like you're an idiot. If you think this, if you think that that's all he wants, there was one person like one person spoke up like, Hey, yes. If you're not interested, just kindly say not interested. That's all. And then it was nice to see. That was great to see.
I think that's when I stopped reading yesterday, I thought it would take a turn for the better, but it didn't amazingly. And it's not like it's a bunch of kids, dog in this. These are grown adults who have spent decades on this earth have been around multiple people. Apparently not enough, but they understand some things that I'll never understand until I get that age or that experience. And here they are talking about how this kid's going to do this. It was just ugly. And for a minute I let myself get to a place where sometimes I can happen to go. I know I talk about being positive, but even me, I can get there too. And I was just like, wow, this is really tough to like, just be around humans that can think that little of a person, I don't know. Yeah. Actually I don't remember his name.
I don't have a connection to him, but here the day and they just put him away, like wrote him off. Yeah. And I don't know if you've ever been written off, but I know I have. It's not a good feeling like at all, you know, that leads me to my next point here. People always ask, how can I increase my sales? How can I do whatever? And you can use this same idea with any kind of position or any kind of job. It doesn't, it doesn't necessarily have to be about eBay. But since a lot of people don't think that eBay has a job, which is hilarious because if you're any kind of good at it, you realize the work it takes. The one most consistently used piece of bad advice I see is people say, just keep listing. So what they're saying is ignore everything else.
Just keep doing what you're doing. And I don't know about you, but if what I'm doing is not producing, why am I doing in that? I don't want to do that. That's a waste. My time. It's a waste of Nick is counterproductive. People say that every day in those groups just keep listing. And I mean, I've, I've proven to myself, like I went three months of that listening thing and I sold something every day. You don't have to keep listing. You just have to be better than you are. And you have to understand what the hell you're doing. If you're at a job, I don't know, making French fries and hamburgers, you're working fast food. And every day all you do is burn the burgers and your boss says, just keep burning them. Would that make any kind of sense? No, it doesn't make sense there.
It doesn't make sense here. I don't know when that became accepted to just keep being not good at what you do. Like why do we accept not good? Why don't we accept not being better? You know? No. I think that sometimes people have their alignment of meaning of words, different than what it could be or what it should be. And words are very powerful. Like humans have the ability to communicate in different ways than other species of animals or whatever it is. We have cognitive thoughts, which allow us to digest that in our head, compute it and then form an opinion, emotion, reaction, whatever. But like you were here, the quote, do you know what the definition of insanity is? And the quote says that the definition of insanity is repeating the same actions and expecting different results. Obviously that's not the definition at all, but it makes sense.
It's insane to think that you will get better by doing the same poor choices. It's insane to think that your position will improve by doing the same things that got you to that position that you don't like. I will never understand that logic I've helped out. A lot of people who like restaurants or bars specifically. Cause I owned some. And one of the questions I like to ask was like, why do you do that? What's the reasoning because I want to understand in order for me to help solve a problem, I have to first understand what the problem is. And I think this applies to this situation as well. But a lot of times people would say, well, we always did that. That's what we've always done. I don't care if you've always done it. If you've always done it and it didn't work. Why in the hell are you still doing it?
You know, I, I, I don't know. I can't think of a reason if I knew that every time I scratched my head, someone punched me in the stomach. You best believe I'm not going to be scratching my head. So I don't know why people would expect something different if they want to increase their sales on an e-commerce platform. One of the most competitive platforms in the world, for example, there are 75 million buyers or sorry, 75 million sellers on eBay, 188 million buyers. He baked, he made a very distant number two to Amazon. If the very distant second has that much competition, why would you rely on the thing that got you nothing to start with? And there's gotta be a time where people can actually say, I'm not good at this. How can I make myself better? And that's where I am. I don't know if, once you start on that thought process, if you've ever actually feel like you're better at it, or if you're good enough at it, I'm not sure I'm not there yet.
The definition of progress forward or onward movement towards a destination for me, if you are not doing anything up or down, staying the same as flat line that does not sound like progress at all in success, the definition of success, the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. If you started this pursuit and you didn't have an aim or purpose, you can not succeed by definition. You can not succeed at that because there's nothing to succeed at. If you don't have an aim or purpose, I personally, I think that's kind of powerful to hear or to understand, to reiterate again, I wasn't always the best at making goals for myself. In fact, I actually, I am a, I'm a habitual over schedule or have goals and tasks, but that's because I, I try to push myself to a point where I probably shouldn't and I get it and I'm working on it, but it doesn't mean that I'm good at it yet.
You know, people will ask me if I'm successful or if I'm, if I'm that perfect thing again and it's nah, bro, not even close, but what I do understand, and maybe people aren't there yet either, but I am is that I know what not do if it didn't work because I already did it. I can learn from understanding that I didn't know what I was doing. And I know better than to tell someone else, keep doing what you're doing. If you don't know what you're doing, keep it going on without an aim or a goal. Keep standing still that I don't think that's any way. How you motivate someone if they said it that bad. Do you think that would come out of the same way? No. So like what did I do personally for me? I, I had like three areas in my life that I wanted to improve.
Originally. I had probably 20 and then throughout the years and throughout the days I slowly kind of got down to three. Three is manageable. 20 is not 20 would set you up for failure. You can ever plan. That is a thing to over plan. And if you don't plan at all, that might be worse. But I, I like to think of it as each day of my life. I want to learn one. I want to earn one and I want to make one. And what does that mean? Is it some catchy thing? Nope. I just thought of it in the car ride back home today. When I wanted to record this, Bob. Yes. It's not a definition of what it was, but the idea, the logic, the principles of it all are the same, but I needed the catchy title and maybe something that would make someone else remember what it was.
And then if I could connect with them, maybe I could help them. Right. So I want to learn one, what am I learning? Or I say, I want to learn one. I am a big believer in education. And before you say, Oh, I thought he said, you know, you don't need to go to college. Yeah. I don't think college is an education. I don't think traditional schooling teaches you as much as it does. I guess, test your discipline. You know, you can get straight, A's all through high or grade school, high school. Well that actually learning much. You're just disciplined enough to follow those rules. And I think those rules goals are there. So whenever you get out, you can follow the rules without, you know, challenging people above you. And I don't, I don't mean like your boss. I mean, it's almost stifling because you're not shown that there's other ways like you can make your own job, be your own boss.
You can dictate your own future, but no one on the way up tells you how to do that. It's always go to school, get a job. I dunno. I feel like there might be one or two more left turns in there and that's why I want to do this is I want to help people get out of that mindset. Why do they have that mindset? You remember 10 minutes ago when I said people say, well, that's the way we've always done it. I hate that. I don't know. I personally think for me to get better, I need educate myself. And does that mean that I need to like educate myself on a history or math or whatever? Not necessarily. It can be really anything. It's all about like a finding the goal, be educating yourself, how best to get to that goal. And then the next one that we'll cover later is getting to that goal.
And then what to do when you get to that goal, you cannot start a job, a task, a plan without knowing where the hell you're headed. You're just not going to get there. You know? Well there's hurt someone's feelings. Maybe, maybe they needed that. But I want to be very clear that I'm not trying to hurt anyone's feelings. I just want you to feel that idea of feeling that maybe you're not doing it right. Just for a second question. Could you do it better? So what do I educate myself on lots of things. Today, you know, for example, I took a course myself on Google analytics because I feel like I'm not very strong where I need to be there. I took a different course on SEO. I'm not where I want to be. So I want to learn more. And I think I read a case.
No, I, I downloaded an ebook, a free book. Yeah. There's thousands of this everywhere. You can get one whenever you want. It doesn't mean they're good though. That's the other thing. Whenever you educate yourself, you don't go in front of people that don't know and then ask them how cause they haven't gotten there yet either. You know, a lot of people have like false idols or false heroes or role models or mentors and they've never done it. You know? That's not someone I think you should re surround yourself with, if you want to be better, if you want to be on their level, that's fine. If I want to be better, I'm going to go be around people that challenge me to get there, their level, they don't brag or like try to compete, but it motivates me to want to be better. Obviously I understand that's completely difficult and in a world where we're in a pandemic and whatever else, but there's, you don't have to know the people like you don't need to be friends.
You just have to find the leaders in that industry that are accepted as those leaders, see what they're doing and see if you can be better than that, or at least as good. That's not bad. And it's weird because for me, like you can watch videos, man. I encouraged to watch videos, but if you're gonna watch videos too, I want you to think about like also watching the speaker, like watch their body language because I think it's so fascinating to watch someone speak, to see if they actually believe in what the hell they're saying. And whenever you can figure out like body language, you're going to be able to get more out of people. You're going to be able to get to your goal faster. You're going to be able to do a lot, but you've got to figure out the body language. You gotta read the room.
You gotta understand, you know, those words while powerful could just be something in the way. What happens a lot of times. And this happens with me with certain students and stuff all the time happened today, I was explaining something to someone and they just kept saying the same thing. Like I'm overwhelmed. I'm just so far behind. I am not at the level are starting as the new one. Doesn't have to be staying the new one. You know, who taught me to me? I used my I don't know computer. I asked people, I did other things. I just didn't sit there and expect someone to say, here's the key. The answer that you're looking for is behind that door. At first, I had to find the door, like, what was I looking for after I found that? And how do I fix that? And how do I solve that?
But just that overwhelming feeling that you have, if you feel overwhelmed that a new job or a new task, or even something like very small, like you want to learn how to use Microsoft Excel. You want to learn how to do spreadsheets, something that's small. You feel overwhelmed. I get like I've been overwhelmed with it was the first time I tried Google analytics. I tried to wait not recommended Facebook, their business manager. I feel like that thing changes every three and a half hours. But if you're feeling overwhelmed and you're not doing anything to try to curb that, you're gonna feel that way. Like I am a I'm a big note taker because I feel like whenever I'm stressed or if I'm feeling overwhelmed, I want to write down what it was that was making me feel that way. And then later I can look back at that and be like, Hm, how do I fix that?
Now? Whenever I'm a little more clearheaded or, Oh, that's a good note to have or whatever, but you're not going to learn if you don't try to learn. E-Bay specifically. Okay. I have a lot of I don't really say a lot of good things about the way that they educate their users. You know, I just feel like they could do more. There's a lot that they could do, I guess maybe for them, they don't think they should, or they don't, it's not their responsibility, which I understand too, in regards to all these new people that start, and then they come and say, I don't have any sales. Are your soil slow? No, they're not bro. Matter of fact, I I sold a shitload of stuff today. I made a lot of money. Am I, am I better? No, not at all. But I guarantee that I did something that 95% of you guys didn't do.
And that's read the roles, the terms and conditions and the policies on the eBay website. Because before you start, she got to know where the hell are you gone? He got to know the rules, that managed payment thing is what really set me off. Like how many people in the past four days have said this and I can count on, you know, not all one answer. I can count a matter of seconds that I remember personally like 12, 14 people. Oh my God. What's managed payments. It was launched over a year ago. I wasn't on it, a mento maybe a month or so ago. And I knew what the hell it was. And again, stress in this. I'm not better than you at all. I'm not perfect. I have feelings. Like I feel a little hungry. What I did was took the time to get that information.
And here is what I think stops people. And I don't know when this happened, but if you ever have in like a debate on social media and then someone comes and knows what the hell they're talking about at first, it was just a bunch of people just blabbering back and forth. And then one person shows up, lays it out. One of those two, typically you're going to say something like, I'm not reading all that. And it's kind of a joke now at this point, but I think just reading hurt, like why do you not want to read? I mean, if anything, it keeps your brain sharp. I feel like I digest information faster through reading. Now at this point and I'm watching videos, I actually have to kick up the speed of it because I can read faster than I can listen to that person.
Talk like, why don't you read it? It doesn't, it doesn't hurt. Yeah. It takes some time. But you get asked her as you do it more. What is it about you compared to me that makes you not want to read that, to learn that? What, why do you think that you can now do what I do without taking the steps, educate yourself on how I did that. If anything, that's just completely like how little you think that the things I do mean, like you think that it's not my skill or my education of that, or my preparation of that that got me there. You think that anyone can do it and you're right. Anyone can do it, but they don't because they don't put in the work earn one. That was where you put in the work. Again. I have too many goals. I have too many projects.
Someone asked me today, how many businesses I own today? And legally I own three, one has six different brands underneath it. So I guess technically I would have nine projects, three businesses. I don't know the correct answer to that. That is actually something I want to learn. So probably tomorrow I'll figure that out to earn one is really just working towards that goal. And you can't just have five goals in your lifetime. You want to set up a bunch of other smaller attainable goals. And the reason why is, if you do not, you're going to get overwhelmed. You're going to quit and get upset, whatever you gotta celebrate. The small wins, just as hard as you celebrate the big wins. And the only way to do that as a set, more structured goals, that to do list, have one a day at first.
I mean, if you're going along and you're crushing that one a day, then add a second. It doesn't matter. It's up to you like what your goals are, but have a goal for that day. I understand that some people don't like to work hard. I personally do. I like to put my effort into something and then see the reward. And then I like to see the effects that it has on people, me, whatever. And like, do I want to have the easiest way there? Honestly, I don't care. It doesn't stop me one way or the other. It doesn't matter to me. So I think if you want something bad enough, it doesn't matter. If you get the easy route, the hard route, whatever, you'll find the wet, you know, actually have it hanging above my desk and my work areas, the words find a way.
So that means to me, you know, regardless if you're tired or you're, you're annoyed or whatever, just figure it out. There's no reason that let XQ stop you from it. If you do the work, you'll see the results. Will that be the best? That depends on the efficiency of the work, but you will see something, right. You'll know where they're to turn left, turn right after a bit of doing the work. But if your answer after doing, and then seeing no improvement is to continue to do that. You know, you're just, you're not going to move. Like the needle was not going up or down. Something happened to me a while ago. Someone told me something along the lines of like, Oh wow, you really deserve that. It kind of took me for a sec, but I was like, I don't deserve that. You know, I don't deserve whatever it was.
I earned that. Right. I don't deserve any of that. You don't deserve anything. No one deserves anything except for, you know, a life and the pursuit. I think everyone deserves to be treated equally. I don't think you deserve opportunities except for the basic ones of life. You know, when they said that to me though, I was wow. Like I don't, I don't agree. I think that I earned it. Like that's mine. I did the work. I changed directions. That's mine. I earned that. So I don't know. Maybe, maybe I think differently. I don't think so. I just think that sometimes I'm able to look at myself and realize that I'm doing or reacting in a way differently. But you know, that goes back to like, what I said last week is that I have now been blessed because of a terrible point in my life that I know will never get that bad again.
So I guess I don't worry as much. One of the things though is to figure out what it is that you want to accomplish. If you just want to make income, you can go do that anywhere, right. You don't have to have that job or this job or a different job. You can get a job wherever, if that's your goal and make income. And there's nothing wrong with that, right? You can do legit, anything. It doesn't matter if you really want to establish goals, you know, you're going to have long-term goals, short-term goals. So for me personally, long-term I want to be more involved and be a better father. Short term would be like, okay, this weekend we'll do the such and such. And this, the short term goals, I feel like are obviously short term because they have an end date and long-term goals for me like, Hey, I want to, I want to read more.
I want to exercise more like they're kind of open-ended, but it's good to have a mixture of both. So the short term ones will bring you closer to the long-term, but that long-term is always going to be rolling a little faster than you're walking, but just know like there's not always going to be, you know, you just wake up and Hey, you're equipped. Like that's not going to happen. Like when I switched to a Mac, a Mac computer, I think I used a Shannon's once or twice. That's my whole experience level. I didn't know anything. And now I'm fairly proficient. Like I can teach myself certain things. And if I don't know, I do the work, I find the research and I, I figured it out. And I think you know, cell phones may have kind of ruined this, but I do a lot of notes and I feel like that helps me retain and also understand.
So when I'm doing notes, I'm not just copying word for word I'm putting in my word. So my brain can understand what that is going on. And then it's actually a proven fact that if you write things, you have a percentage higher. I don't know the percentage, but you can retain things better. And I think like maybe our disconnect from the world from being on our phones all the time, kind of ruin that possibly. I don't know, try that. Yeah. But those goals on paper, I found that whenever you write stuff out as well, like that makes it real. And if you can't make it real, you know, you're not going to take it serious. And again, I'll throw back to this E-bay thing that right. Really upset me for the fact that I don't know why sometimes people, especially now maybe it's just cause I notice it more because I'm older or I gotten soft because I'm a dad, but people would just kind of think that that's just going to happen.
Like you're going to be given, you know, the best. And again, you don't deserve it. You just deserve the right to try to earn it. Make one. What does that mean? So for me, make one is another kind of big part of my life and that's the helping someone else accomplish something or helping them obtain their goal. Or just doing something for someone. And I don't mean like helping your buddy do something. Cause he, you know, you owe him a favor or anything like that. I mean, like doing something without the expectation of of reciprocation, you're legitimately helping someone, you know, you can have obvious reasons for wanting to do it. Like it makes you feel better about yourself or I dunno, you get like a reward. Like I do. Like I get like a definitive reward. Like I feel like fulfilled, I guess.
I made a lot of money in my lifetime and a lot of people think like success is measured by the amount of dollars in your bank account. I tend to disagree. And I think that for me, I measure success just a little different. And I don't know if it's because my life experiences have brought me to think that way or what, but you know, like for me, I like, I like to know that say if I were to pass away, you know, God forbid I would want to know that people spoke to my son when he got older, you know, in a, in a positive light, because I would want him to have the best legacy thoughts of me as possible. You know, I, one of the other reasons I like to help people too is because I like to, I like to learn people and maybe not just like specifically that person, but I like to see different emotions that have different people were different experiences.
And then maybe I can't ever live in their shoes, but I can get kind of closer, you know? And then if I can have that experience or just like a taste of that experience, maybe I can apply that somewhere else. And also like I grew up in small town, West Virginia, we didn't have diversity at all. Right. and I don't mean diversity, just racial. I mean, there, wasn't a lot of thought difference between people either. So helping people allows me to have a little more diversity and I, I believe firmly that if you have diversity in your life, you can kind of grow and Excel at different levels because you are then met with different challenges or see someone else met with different challenges. If that makes any kind of sense at all. Diversity, I think that was big. Like that can give you your own outlook on yourself.
Like to go that path. Not that path or switch it up. No, it what's cool about like helping people as well. It's like, you can like physically see them at a bad point. And then now I'm at a better point. Like the, the whole body language changes, whatever, it's something as simple as their eyebrows or their eyelids moving up slightly to let them more light. Or if it's something as obvious as like a smile, if you watch without being a weirdo, like don't just stare at him in the face, like a staring gun. That's what it'd be watch. You can notice the little nuances. And after you study enough people, you can kinda see that across everyone, small things, not like obvious things, but you know, you learn that as a child from watching other people. And then you kind of mimic that. You can start to do that.
The other reason that I like to help people is because I like to believe in the good of people. Like I like to think that like at the end of the day, yes, there's some out there, but by and large people are okay right now for a lot of people that's really tough to get around. Like they can not grasp that when people were just pitted against each other and it's not their fault so much. I mean, it is obviously because you control your reaction and whatnot, but it's tough to fault them for the fact that like there's an unprecedented amount of money going into is making people spiel different emotions than they used to. And it's tough to like get out of that rhythm if you don't love yourself, like, do you want to help? Like people, like, if you're sitting there thinking like, Hey, I'll try it.
Then I'm not here to make you feel bad cause you haven't done enough. That's not my place to say it will never be my place to say that you, you know, for some people, like they feel like they've done their part. And to that I say try maybe a little more, you know, what's, what's enough. What, how do you define that? I would ask, I guess, you know, some people, like I said, they define what they've done in dollars and then it comes to me and I define my things. Like, I guess the word I would say is calm that you feel. So I know that like I succeeded to my levels of the idea of success because I'm calm about it. And to further explain that, like I succeeded in my relationship because I can be with them and not feel any kind of something negative.
I'm just calm the whole time. We'd have an argument and I'll be still pretty calm. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel like I'm being used. I don't feel like they're unfaithful or anything like that. I have a calm and that's for me a level of success. That's I think maybe my biggest contributor to what I think of. So that goes the same with like business or work. If I am calm and relaxed in that spot, I did. All right, because how many times can you truthfully say, you know, I was, I was completely relaxed at work unless you're getting hammered or you're asleep. Probably not very often. You know, the other thing is like that calm. You can actually see it on other people. So like for me, the ultimate level of success is whenever you can make other people feel okay, you know, like I feel like I can eventually say like when my son's older, like he's not worried or like she's not worried right now because she knows that like, or they both know, I guess that I'll do everything in my power to try to prevent any kind of like bad from happening to them.
That I think is a pretty powerful success rate there. And you know, I like to go back again, like how will people remember me? I don't know my father, I don't know if I mentioned that before, but never met the guy. It's a long story. For me, the only memory I have of him as having me memories of him, not around or him not, they're not good, you know? And he actually very mellow may be alive and well right now I did an ancestry thing and narrowed it down to two guys. I just, I just stopped there though. But yeah, like how will be, remember me? Well, they feel calm when they do it. Like a good feeling. Well they like maybe potentially they think, Oh, that was such a waste of like potential or man, that guy was a real jerk or whatever.
I guess me success. Isn't something crazy more of it is, is that your just okay. Being okay, so yeah. What's next from here for you. It's, it's going to depend on you. You're going to want to decide if you are going to be one of those people that expected an easy button, or if you want to decide if you're going to just be a person that has just gone through the motions or if you want her to decide to do something better, you know, I, I really tried to like provide some kind of value to everyone that I can, if it's wanted a, like, I don't just go push all this stuff on people and be, you know, if I can, like, I don't waste their time and like give them a bunch of false hopes. Can you do better financially? Yeah. Can you do better on your family life?
Yup. Can you do better in your relationships or I don't know if there's anything you can't do better than maybe if you were born with a disability, maybe that might be, you know, a glass ceiling, but even then I would imagine you can just work around, you know, a measure, a different metric. So I guess like for you, maybe just think of it, like, what is it that you wanted to say is that's what made me successful? I'll tell you what it, not what it isn't and that's being one of those people that jump online and just. And then they say like, this is the reason why, and the none of those reasons are themselves always start there. And honestly, 99% of the time you can end there without going anywhere else. Yeah. Thank you guys for allowing me this time to bent, but try it. Yeah. If you like it, let me know. I'd love to hear about it. Stop by the Facebook page, facebook.com/school of self-made leave it, leave a note, you know, whatever it is, but swing on by there. Tell me tell me if you want to learn one, earn want to make one. I actually thought that was pretty clever on regard right here. Huh? And I actually might use that more often in my life, but yeah, that's it guys. I will see you next time. And thank you again
For being here with me. Me. See you.
Transcript has been produced by temi.com. No formal editing has been done on this particular transcript.